TL;DR I promise I’m not dead, I just had an interesting time the past couple of months.
So you may have noticed that I haven’t really posted anything in the past couple of months and you’re probably wondering why. Between looking for a proper job, not getting my projects done within the time frame that I’ve wanted, and being discouraged by my lack of weight loss and proper body sculpting, I’ve been feeling a little overwhelmed and I fell into the common procrastinator’s trap of, “Oh, I’ll just do it tomorrow,” only to find that I’ve been overdue for an essay for a long ass time. Oops.
But worry not, dear readers, as I have a small batch of good news for you.
First, I’d like to announce that I finally got a new job as a sort of construction worker! I’m not going into much more detail than that, as once again my Prime Directive for the time being is to protect the identity of my Creator, but this should help me with a couple of goals: first it’ll help me lose weight; working outside and building shit will do that to you. Secondly, it’ll help me work up a more regular schedule that I can stick to and do the things that I want to do outside of work, like write essays and fanfiction.
Speaking of which, that brings me to my second bit of news: There’s going to be a small change in format. This isn’t something that’s either good or bad, but it’s something that I feel is necessary. You see, when I started this blog, the idea was to write essays and then use those essays as a script for my YouTube channel. As you can plainly see, that hasn’t happened, because I don’t think it’s a model I can follow. Writing essays takes something out of me. I am both figuratively and literally pouring my soul into each and everything that I write, and essays take more out of me than any other form of literature. Not to mention, by the time I’ve written up a script and ready to record my melodious synthesized voice box onto a video, everyone had already moved on. I’ve wanted to do commentaries on Bill Nye Saves the World, the Equinox LGBT video, and, most recently, the video that was put up just under a week ago about parents talking to their kids about masturbation. Much like The Room and Food Fight, reviewing certain movies has just become passé unless you have the proper fanbase for it. So instead of just waiting for the video to escape people’s attention, I’m changing the format of this blog from a written medium to at least an auditory one, whether it would be a podcast or a new YouTube commentary channel, that remains to be seen. (Probably YouTube.)
Thirdly, after a bit of soul-searching (and yes, I do have a soul because shut up.), I stopped body sculpting for a while. Seeing all of the negativity towards transwomen with their male bits intact made me question for a while whether it would be worth it to even sculpt my body if no one would want to bang me. I was led to believe that a lot of people (my Creator included) found transwomen (shemales, dickgirls, futanaris, etc.) attractive. After seeing a slew of negative reactions to such people in real life, it made me question whether or not I wanted to continue to hold this sort of thing up as my ideal of beauty; and this stems from far further back than just recent events: for as far back as my Creator’s memories go, he’s always wanted to be a girl/woman. Not because he thought that women got preferential treatment, or that they could do practically anything and somehow get away with it, or even that it was and still is more acceptable for a women to do certain things than it was/is for a man to do, but because that girls and women got to wear whatever the fuck they wanted, but God forbid if a boy or man should ever even consider what it may be like to wear a skirt.
So I decided, “fuck it,” I’m going to wear whatever the fuck I want, and I’m going to do whatever the fuck I want to my body, up to and including giving myself bigger breasts so I can fill out those tops and dresses that I want, and if anyone’s got a problem with that, they can kiss the darkest parts of my ass.
Sorry for all the vulgarities, this has been a long time coming, and I can’t think of a more efficient route to convey to amount of disgust, anger, anguish, anxiety, and depression that I feel in this situation. (Wow, that’s four out of the five Inside Out emotions, here’s to holding out for Joy.)
Lastly, since I got a new job that actually pays well and I don’t mind at all doing, I’m going to be removing the perks off of my Patreon account. I know, all 0 of you contributors are all broken up about it, I know. I will be setting up a PayPal tip jar instead, and if you want something commissioned, you can pay me through there, I’ll be sure to put my rates up on one of my social media platforms at some point. (It’ll probably be about $10-$20 for short stories less than 1000 words, to start off with.)
“But BT, what about the essays?”
I’ll still be writing them, just not as much. Remember, I’m switching gears, here. Most of my content I wrote on the premise of maybe putting them on my YouTube channel someday. If and when I do that, most of my stuff will be unscripted, and thus not written. But doing stuff like my multi-part essay on sexercises that probably too hot for YouTube to handle? Yeah, that will probably still be written up and posted on my WordPress.
I think that wraps up what I wanted to say with this, so until next time, dearies!